It’s so easy to be a victim. I’ve done it myself many times in my career and in my own business. It looks like this, you have a week or two of feeling really productive and confident. You’re super excited about your future and feel on top of the world. Fast forward two weeks and WHAM the universe slams your confidence and you go into victim mode. Your weeks of work didn’t turn into some fantastic dream outcome, nothing happened. NOTHING. You feel powerless and as if the world is spiraling out of your control. Instead of continuing your progress you give up and assume that the dream or goal you want isn’t for you and you should pursue something else. Thus you go back into hiding, becoming invisible to the opportunities that are around you further perpetuating your feeling of failure.
Sound familiar? It should because it is. It’s totally normal to get discouraged when things don’t go as planned. It’s also normal to shy away and shut down. I call the process after a perceived failure going into “invisibility mode”.
The problem with “invisibility mode” is that you may feel safe and secure, closed off from any additional hurt but in exchange your mindset and confidence are shattered leaving no energy to invest in your own happiness. The more you are in “invisibility mode” the less you’re likely to get what you want, grow your confidence and create the happiness you desire.
Invisibility = dispensability
Since you’re invisible (no this isn’t a super hero trait) your boss won’t realize your efforts or work. You are less likely to self-promote your work and talents. Your clients won’t come running in the door. And the consequences of invisibility go on.
The point of this blog isn’t to shame you for failure or for internalizing defeat by going into “invisibility mode”. The point is to create an awareness around your own energy and attitude.
Once we have awareness we can build resilience. If we’re aware that we shut down and that it’s a natural habit, we can then see opportunities to overcome “invisibility mode”. We can give ourselves permission to feel down but also give ourselves permission to try again.
Are you in “invisibility mode”? If so, how is it impacting your career? Happiness? Success? Write down the ways that “invisibility mode” is helping or hurting you. Then take small steps to put yourself out there and be vulnerable again.
“A river cuts through a rock not because of its power, but its persistence”.
Career & Life Coach for Millennials, helping you design your happy life.