We’re a culmination of our decisions. Are you feeling unhappy? Overweight? Like a failure? Not good enough? As a life coach I hear these self-judgments often, so no worries you’re not alone.
I have good news and bad news for you. The bad news is that there’s no one to blame but yourself for these feelings. The good news is that you have the power to change those feelings.
The greatest shifts that I see within my clients that create success is when they shift their thoughts from a victim mentality to an ownership or responsibility mentality. What does that mean? A victim mentality is one where you’re blaming the world for what’s happening to you. Like constantly saying the only reason you’re not successful is because you have a crappy boss or because you don’t have enough money. The downfall of this mentality is that it drains your energy and doesn’t inspire solutions, it only keeps you feeling “stuck” or disheartened. Do you have a victim mentality?
If you approach your life with a responsibility mindset you are taking ownership of how you feel and act. You look at your problems and recognize the role that you play in them. Are you broke? Ask yourself what are you doing to save? Are you unhealthy? Ask yourself what you’re doing to get better. Insert yourself into the problem so you can find a solution.
Now ask yourself sincerely, Do you see your life and problems from a victim mentality or responsibility mentality?
If it's a victim mentality, what steps can you take to take ownership of your thoughts and actions?
I love this quote from Tony Robbins, “If you’re going to make a change, you’re going to have to operate from a new belief that says life happens not to me but for me.” If you really want to create your success, the place to start is taking ownership of the things that you can control that impact your success. Start believing that you and only you are the reason for your success.
Cheers to new beliefs!
Exercise: Write down all of the obstacles in your life. Then list out the corresponding reason why they're problems. Are you holding a belief that they're problems because of something that you can't control? If the answer is yes, then ask yourself if I were taking responsibility for this what would change.
Millennial Life & Career Coach in Denver, Los Angeles, New York, Chicago and beyond